Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Educational reflection

My to-do list gets longer, but so do my responsibilities. It's nice being busy and I need to say 'yes' as much as possible right now because in this business it's never secure. I have been teaching a ton this summer. This gives me an opportunity to try out a whole bunch of stuff, as well as rely on what's tried and true. I am having a good time with the second crop from Cal Shakes. They are for the most part smart and respectful and trying new things. As theatre kids many are too clever and witty for their own good. But there's little I can do there. I did request one of the boys to do an exercise 'for himself' yesterday, rather than trying to impress a bunch of the girls. He basically said that he didn't understand what I was talking about, but I know in his heart he did.

As I lead one of the groups today on finding their centers (head, chest, belly or hips) they were very thoughtful in discussion and armed with this new knowledge they tried it on for size. Looking around the room, there were enormous changes. I saw a completely different group of kids walk each and every time depending on which center they walked from. It was beautiful. I am not sure they were conscious about it and in a way I hope they were not. This work can be largely unconscious - coming more from the body and less from the mind.

In any case, it was inspirational.

These kids may not "get it" at this go-around. But I know that it's affecting them. And in terms of credit, I really don't care. I personally know that I am making a difference, especially when a few thank me at the end of the session. I am giving them food for thought to take into their lives.

And that's exciting!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Gratitude

I have been super lazy around my appointments to teach, audition and perform the last few days. Perhaps it was my health insurance conversation with JRB over lunch, but today I feel old. I took a nap again just as I did yesterday afternoon. I did vacuum and mop, but there's a ton on my to-do list. I have dance class in 30 minutes and I really don't want to go. I had an old day during Sarah's class a few weeks ago and it was awful. Hopefully it will turn around as soon as we start the abs section.

Anyway, no word on the auditions from yesterday, but I did teach 3 good classes today. The Cal Shakes kids are a smart bunch. I'm curious to see where we'll be able to go. However, in my not so positive state right now I thought it would be a good time to do a gratitude check-in.

What I'm Grateful For:
1. work through mid-October
2. laundry in the apartment
3. ibuprofen
4. leftovers
5. sunny skies
6. willing students and active assistants

Monday, July 26, 2010

Showing my Wears

Even though I was crampy and irritable and had a sore throat I had a good show last night and two good auditions today. On Friday I get a call from the folks at ACT they were holding a round of auditions Monday for Tales of the City. I totally ate those books up in paperback and never thought I would ever get a call. It would have been nice if I had a little more time to prep, but I am not one to be picky. I had to trust my talent and with an early morning audition I had to bank on my technique. They wanted a pop-rock song and since the Scisssor Sisters are composing JRB recommended singing How Deep Is Your Love by the BeeGees. I have been cramming lyrics for that and Eddie Floyd's On the Radio since Saturday night when I met with Dave Moschler. I got up super early and luckily Jerald was in Sac so I could warm up and freak out. This included all of my warm ups and singing both songs down the octave, up the active, on vowel - even singing in bent over. That one got me a little sick to my stomach. I was not sure if that was nerves or being light-headed. Luckily, the high range was there when I needed it and the folks at ACT and my fellow auditionees were quite lovely. I was also able to get out in time to make it up to Mill Valley to teach Playwriting this morning. The kids were a little scattered. We moved to the theatre and it was a little distracting teaching in the lobby of the theatre.

I was pretty out of it for the rest of the day. I was too nervous to eat breakfast so I made some cheese toast and soup when I got home and then passed out on the couch.

I got up in time to get down to Lafayette to audition at Town Hall for Glass Menagerie. Susannah Martin is directing and while I dusted off the Darlene Craviotto's Pizza Man monologue I have been doing for the past 15 years I found some new things. At last night's performance of The Real Thing there was tons of new energy. Not surprising in the second week of a three week run. It was exciting to respond to new things. What did surprise me is what Ms. Martin coaxed out of me this evening. I hoped to pull out a new piece, but with my schedule I decided to mold the Pizza Man piece into Amanda's world. I have done the piece with just about every dialect and have changed the age of the character in question as I have matured. This morning I put it at 30 and for the first time this evening I did it at 40. It's been a while that I was given direction on a monologue and it was kinda nice. I noticed Susannah's head nodding as I found a new way through her direction. I cannot even tell you how I love that. It felt great. It's the mark of a smart director, a good piece and an actor who listens.

As I begin to teach the second 2-week Cal Shakes camp I am so excited to add an acting class to the movement regiment. I had a little freak out a few minutes ago when I realized that I didn't plan tomorrow's class. Luckily I have all of the DRA 10 notes and to be honest, I can teach an intro class with little planning. In class one, how can I get the students to relax and observe. I have them for 5 sessions (a combo of acting and movement) so I think I can wait until session 2 to play with trust.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Hump Day Check-in

I have been scarily tired lately. I'm sure it has everything to do with staying out late and driving home pinching myself to keep my eyes open, but still. My body needs rest. It's 11:24pm and I really need to be in bed. I saw Mrs. Warren's Profession at Cal Shakes tonight and am completely riled up. I had a little snack, watched Top Chef and am ready to pass out. I even took a nap today, what the heck is going on?

Either way, I need to keep focused and pro-active. Super proud of my work in The Real Thing, I emailed all of the Artistic Directors and Casting Directors from the major theatres. I got some responses back, but not a ton. And only the folks from Marin Theatre Company are going to come out and see it. I am trying, but I still don't think the Bay Area is the best fit for me. I'm not throwing in the towel quite yet, but I need to keep my eyes open for other options.

There's more that I could say, but I really need to hit the hay (oooh, i made a funny!)

Things I am grateful for:
1. Good theatre close by
2. My yogi friends
3. Involvement in a good show, with a good cast
4. My loving kitties
5. The generosity of my yoga students today - in turn, I taught a good class
6. Wine and chocolate

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Trust and Inclusion

Last night we opened The Real Thing at Livermore Shakespeare and it was an amazing success. The show has been in really good shape for a while, but I have not been pulling my weight. It wasn't until just recently that I realized that the role of Charlotte is really hard. She is only in 3 scenes so there's not a huge margin of error to get my message out clearly. Once I got costumes, It was also apparent that the times I am seen are never just ordinary days. Perhaps that makes it easier. I can never sit back, but must remain engaged, in motion and proactive.

Gosh, that's a return on a theme.

The last few runs were hard since I knew I missing something, but didn't know what it was. The jokes fell flat and I just felt bitchy and not witty or in charge. I decided to return to a bit of technique and made sure I radiated out from the stage to the audience.

THE AUDIENCE.

Um, duh. You know the reason why we tell these stories in the first place? Yeah, them.

We had our first audience on Thursday preview and I was now aware of a new energy and new responsibility. To include the audience. They need to feel a part of the experience. And especially for Charlotte, I need to have them on my side. For opening last night my goal was to be the woman they love to hate. And I was. The laugh lines landed well and surprisingly enough we had to hold for laughter in places for the first time. It was exciting and electric. I had something to say - something to add to the story.

Lastly, I just needed to chill out and trust my talent and technique. I studied comedy for a full year to unlock the reasons why I seemed to fail at comedy on stage. I know it works. I know I can do it. But most of the time my brain censors and my own insecurity gets in the way. I forced myself to let that go last night as I looked out at the vineyards.. I took the stage like I was meant to be there, connected with my fellow actors, desired something from the characters in the scene and FOUGHT LIKE HELL to get it and of course, brought the audience along.

I am having a rather lazy day. I will take a shower, grab some lunch and head back to Livermore to do it all over again.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Saturday afternoon coming down

Last night I went into SF to see the 10pm performance of Joe Goode's Traveling Light at the Old Mint in SOMA. Randy got free tickets through TBA and even though I had plans to see Romeo & Juilet at LSF I decided to change plans and go into the city instead. It was a truly wonderful show that had the audience in 4 sections and moving from room to room. It reminded a bit of the middle section of Fefu where the audience travels to each of the rooms, however just like 2 characters went between rooms, most of the dancers last night performed in more than one piece. Randy and I both agreed that our order was the best. There was a nice arc and the flashiest piece from a technical standpoint was our finale. My head was spinning so it took me a bit to get to bed which made it even harder to get up this morning.

Since I was not called to rehearsal today, I decided to go to another Laughter Yoga session in Oakland. It was a smaller group and had a different energy. I liked some of the exercises, but preferred to do more laughing and less talking. The best thing is that I came up with an addition to Laughter is a River. And will now be playing with Laughter is a Geyser, as well. I planned to go to Chauncey's jazz class at The Beat afterwards, but I got caught in traffic and really just wanted to head home. I wound up being a few minutes late, but at the Ashby exit, I decided to just get off and go to class. It was a good one and I totally needed it.

As I sit on the couch, I am really quite content. I told Jerald that I would see his show tonight, but honestly, I really don't want to get up. I think I will do a bit of cleaning, watch some Harry Potter on TV and go to bed early.

While in the shower last night I decided that the cabaret I would like to do should be a retrospective of songs I've sang in cabarets past or were influences on my life. The list now includes: The Rose, I'm Not at All in Love (Pajama Game), something from Anything Goes, What Makes me Love Him, New York State of Mind, Midnight Train to Georgia, Sitting on the Dock of the Bay, Somewhere That's Green, Desperado, Hard Travelin', I Wanna Be Loved By You, Get Here, I Just Can't Wait to Be King, Miss Byrd, Taylor the Latte Boy, Valentine's Day, Branson, Annie Medley, Put Your Record On, If This Isn't Love, Old Man River and I'll Follow You into the Dark.

Gosh that's quite a list. Busy, busy busy. The creativity continue. But for now, I'll rest.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

One down...

This is the summer of 3 camps, the return of teaching at UC Davis and doing The Real Thing with Livermore Shakespeare. It's not even 11pm and I am tired. Not only that but I took a nap today. I am going to climb into bed and start this craziness up again tomorrow.

Today was the last day of the Holy Names camp for me through Cal Shakes. I was with the older group and for the most part it was truly satisfying. The kids as a whole are lazy and it just drives me crazy. However, I may have to take some of the responsibility and add things that are more engaging. Ah, I miss working with college kids.

Rehearsal today was equally satisfying. Or perhaps a little more so. Now that I am no longer struggling with lines (and didn't get a single line note) I found a whole mess of fun. It's amazing how much the unsuredness of lines really held me back. I am super excited to see how things progress and how the technical elements bring us to the next level.

In the meantime, here's a bit of gratitude:
1. employment
2. kind and genuine people
3. a clean and reliable automobile
4. leftovers
5. kitties on the couch next to me

Friday, July 2, 2010

The Test of Time

I have been working on lines for The Real Thing pretty diligently for the past 3 days. I've had my scripts with me and I recorded my lines and put on my ipod so I could listen both in the car and in bed.

Yes, I did go to sleep two nights with them in my ears. And yes, after the first night I did have quite a few bizarre dreams. I really wish I remembered them now. But they were truly out there.

So tonight we have our first spacing rehearsal at the winery and I am curious to see how I really did. I hope that my confidence level stays high and that I have brought as much to the table as everyone else has. That's the real issue. I am working with such a strong crew I don't want to disappoint or be the weak link. I have found a good bit of new things and I really cannot wait to share them tonight. I do have to be honest and say that a few of the retorts are still questionable. I am not sure what Stoppard was trying to say. I mean some of Charlotte's lines are complete digs, but I am not sure who she is digging AT or how venomous she is. Luckily we have two weeks of rehearsal left, so I can keep playing.

Teaching has also been going well. I am teaching movement at one of the two 2-week Cal Shakes camps to ALL ages. Grade 3 - grade 12. It's fascinating to see the differences between ages and groups. Sometimes I am super successful and things stick and others the kids look bored. I know some of it's not me, but for the most part I need to figure out the best thing for each age group. Quite a learning experience for me, too. I get the older kids again today. I conquered 2 of the 3 classes yesterday, but the middle age group of the older kids just struggled. Lots of clique-y girls and low energy. That caused me to shut down and get all scattered. Not really how I like to lead a class.

I teach a Renaissance dance class on Monday and then move on to Playwriting with MTC soon. So, I need to start planning those lessons, as well.

Yay, for being busy and the subsequent paychecks!

Gratitudes:
1. paid gigs
2. nice sunny weather
3. coffee
4. carpools
5. a subletting roommate who keeps me tidy(ier!)