I always find it odd that I take on the tone of the movie I'm watching. I guess I could say the same for a book, but unfortunately I don't read very often. I went to see Public Enemies with Sarah and Jamie after a nice lunch at Crepeville. We went in knowing the movie was subpar, but I liked it. I forgot the details of his death so the particulars were a surprise for me. However, as I biked home I did feel like I was being watched and my awareness peaked with I saw a cop car driving down C Street. Nevertheless, I felt very strong. I had a confidence boost and know that I have the skills I need to take hold of my future. I can be whatever I want to be. An educator, a performer and producer.
I am not sure what it was but I started relating to Marion Cotillard's character when I got home. The jilted lover. I started talking in my thick New York dialect for a few minutes. I made up silly dialogue that sounded like it was out of The Sopranos until I grabbed my keys and went to pick up cat food and toilet paper in the outside world. Now I'm just sad. When I gave my phone number to the cashier at Petco so he could credit my shopper card he asked where the area code was from. "Atlanta," I said. "Your far away from home, " he responded. He asked me if I missed it and in my melancholy state, I did. Maybe it's the heat or maybe I am taking on the life of the story. I cannot be sure. I certainly felt like fighting evil upon leaving the theatre after Harry Potter, but this is lasting longer than usual. I don't like it. I really just want to be by myself.
While I'm here I guess I can get my gratitudes out of the way, but honestly my sadness is going to make this hard.
1. air conditioning
2. reliable transportation
3. living by myself so I cannot be judged for my lack of tidiness
4. my cats for their love and attention
5. power buttons - on my laptop and my cell phone. So, I can shut out the world if I want to.
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